As if yesterday wasn't long enough we had more paperwork. We really only had to go to the noterary but it took FOREVER and poor Isac was restless, it was getting to be lunch time, his normal nap time and he was just done being in a room where he wasn't allowed to touch anything. And we were done for him! But of course one of the papers was't done right sooo more waiting for things to get fixed. We started seeing glimpses of greiving too. For the most part he will go to either one of us, the only time he shows any favortism is one one tells him no and he cries he will go seek comfort in the other, lol. But yesterday morning was different. When he was getting restless or told no he would just want to lay one the floor in cry. Holding him when he got like this was no help, it just made him cry harder. Some of it may have been that the lady from the orphanage was there and I'm not sure if he recognized her (this is the woman who brought him into the room with us on gotcha day) but probably having a woman speaking to him in Chinese instead of my English made him feel some of the loss. I have to say though it was tough it isn't normal for him and he did still find rest in my arms. In fact he eventually let me rock him to sleep in the end. Poor little guy.
From there we went to Isac's finding place. I struggled with feeling of going there. I wanted to go there for my ownn idea of where it was, but at the same time I felt like it was like wanting to go to a funeral. No one
wants to go to a funeral but they go to pay respects and say goodbye. I felt like I was making the choice to go to a place where a woman had to make a choice to leave this sweet boy. But none the less we went. It was in the front of a park area, right across from a HUGE "mall". Sadly it was November so it must have been chilly, but it was in an area where many people would have walking by to see him and in a very good part of town.
After we left we walked across the store to get some snacks and diapers for Isac. The "mall" was HUGE! Lots of stores with all kinds of stuff and towards the back is the grocery store that honestly was a lot like Walmart. I saw none of the crazy things hanging that I hear some adoptive parents see, it honestly felt like home (minus all the stares)! Even playing all American music! After we were done shopping we ate at KFC and headed back to the hotel to lay Isac down for a nap.
We stayed in ou hotel for the rest of the night but went out for a walk around the block (the farthest I would let Josh take us) but it was pretty cold!
This night was the beginning of homesickness for me! I have felt pretty good up to this point but I read an email from my mom saying how much Anna really missed us and it just hit hard. I hardly slept that night and woke up crying some more. I had a hard time Skyping because I didn't want the girls to see me crying.
As another adoptive mom told me, like Christ, leaving the 99 to go get the 1...a mama's gotta do what a mama's got to do!
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| sleepy boy |
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| snuggles with Baba |
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| our tech savy baby |
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| more paper work...yay |
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| Finding place |
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| the "mall" |
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| Looooves french fries |
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| KFC |
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| peace! |
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